Jesus is the baby's daddy! (And no, NOT Anna Nicole's baby)

Well. I've been on a little bit of a hiatus, but all is well. And I've RETURNED!! And boy do I have a good one, for you. I'm a gossip whore, yes, it's true. And earlier this morning I stumbled across what is possibly the most epic, reality altering, mind~numbing scandal I've ever heard of. Supposedley, the man we ((most of us)) know and love as Jesus, bless his soul, has a SON. The woman known as Mary Magdalene is widely believed to be the mother of little Judas, Jesus' son. *GASP* And there is to be a discovery channel special airing this sunday about the whole thing. If my information is correct, a tomb has been found, several miles away from where jesus rose from the dead, where they found a little coffin with "Judas, son of Jesus" enscribed on it. Sounds a little sketchy to me. I mean, what are the odds? Regardless, you better fuckin' (<<'scuse me lord) believe that I'm gonna watch that documentary. But anywayz, do y'all realize what this means? Undoubtedley, Jesus could very well have a living decsendant walking around today. A living, breathing holy grail. Gives you the chills, doesn't it? But who in God's name could it be? That little kid with the zits @ the Target checkout counter? Your neighbor across the street? ME? Ooooh lord this is SO exciting!!!

Damn.... I'm CRUSHED....

Well y'all.... i'm rather sad right about now. It seems that my baby daddy, Usher, isn't as gay as I thought. (As IF. The following story I'm about to tell is prolly just a front!) But anywayz, I was informed that Usher Raymond IV proposed to his current-past girlfriend, Tameka Foster, on Valentines day. A date for the wedding has yet to be set. But.... I wonder if Chile knows? And how she feels about the whole situation? But FUCK Chile. What about MY feelings? I'm so devastated. Once Usher hit broadway, I just knew he was gonna come out of the closet. (LOL) But alas, he's still pretending. But that Tameka bitch is SO not right for him. I mean the heffa has three kids, and she's built like an amazon. But hey Ush, whateva floats your boat. I hope you're happy in love. But... speaking of love, there's a song I want you to hear, and it's my new very favorite love song ever. It comes courtesy of a band of nerds who call themselves "Gym Class Heroes". The lead singer is sooooooo fucking HAWT. Oooooooh, yes, he is! And the vid is hilarious and cute. Anywayzm here you are:

"Cupid's Chokehold"

Alicia Keyes, the Frog Princess..

Credible sources sat that Alicia Keys is set on a campaign to land the lead role in Disney's upcoming animated musical, The Frog Princess.
Word is, after AK auditioned she actually called Disney's studio chief, Dick Cook, directly to let him know how much she wanted the gig. "She did it all herself," according to a source close to the studio. "She got one of his personal numbers and just called him up."
Keys is one of many hopefuls being considered to voice Mandy, a young southern girl living in New Orleans during the roaring '20s Jazz Age. "One of the big questions is if Alicia can do a Southern accent, because she has such that New York voice," the source said.
If she lands this role Keys would become the first African American Disney princess. You betta DO it Bitch! (LOL) I hope she waxed her chest hair for her audition.
Other alleged top contenders include Oscar-nominee Jennifer Hudson and her Dreamgirls costar and Tony Award winner Anika Noni Rose. Who do y'all think's gonna get it? I'm thinking the role will go to J~Hud.... but..... none of the other Disney Princesses are chunky.... so who KNOWS who'll get the part?? I hope Alicia does. Hairy though she is.... I STILL love her! (LOL)

So much fun....

Don't ask me how I find this shit. Just be glad that I find it, and then bring it back to you. Okay, so you may or may not know that I've been having a bit of a feud with an absurd bitch. (who I won't name right now.) Well, I still have a deep hatred for her, and everything she does. Including her blog. That's when I came across what is now possibly my favorite website of all time. Here's the link to help you "Bust shit up".
All you have to do is type in the url of a webpage that you would like to see destroyed, and then you get to choose HOW you destroy it. You can throw darts at the page, burn it up in flames, send ghosts to haunt it, whack it with a giant hammer, you can do whatever you want to that page. It's so fun that I almost lost control. And it's even MORE fun if you have a particualar malice against the blog...er....WEB PAGE...... that you're blowing up with ticking timebombs. (LOL) Anywayz, go take out some aggression on your least favorite website, you bipolar whore.

Cordially~~~

Royal*T

Too much time on his hands...

Okay, Okay, Okay..... so this doesn't exactly qualify as "gossip". But dammit, this is MY muthafuckin' blog and I'll put whatever I WANT on here, shit. (LOL) And if you don't like it, your bitch ass can STEP! (LOL) Okay, but seriously. I came across this wonderful clip of a beatboxing, flute~playing, remixing nerd who has absolutely no life at all, apparently. When I watched it, I was amazed, and shocked, and disturbed, and even a little disgusted all at once. Imagine how much SPIT must be logged in that flute... Ugh. But I digress, Here you go, bitch. The "Inspector Gadget Beat-box remix". Enjoy. Or laugh. Or gag, or do whatever the HELL you want....

HAHAHAHA!

Can you tell who this woman is? Because it took me a minute.

...Have you figured it out yet?

....Still haven't? Well i'm impatient, so I'll just enlighten your dumb ass. This, people, is Eddie Murphy's alleged "Baby Momma", Mel B. Talk about SCARY Spice. Ewww. She looks ROUGH. Personally, I never really thought she was pretty. But hey, what can ya say? She must really be going through it. You did know, of course, that Eddie Murphy isn't claiming the baby as his? After seeing this, can you BLAME him?

Britney the bald...

Happy tuesday, bitch. It's been a looooooong weekend for Royal~T, and it's been a hella PARTIFIED weekend, too. I got so wasted that I had to take an extra day off (yesterday) to recuperate. When I logged off of blogger on Friday, I must say that I was a bit down. But alas, Four days, six orgasms, two fights, one marriage proposal, one break~up, and seven shots of something I didn't even know what it was later, I'm here, and I'm queer, and I'm better than EVER! Now aren't you lucky? Okay, enough about me. Let's get on to this. I came across this absurdly stupid picture a while ago. Look at it:

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW. Don't she look like quite possibly the dumbest bitch this side of Russia? Girl please. Britney is such an attention whore, and this picture makes it OBVIOUS that she'll do anything for a little spotlight and camera time. But BALD is NOT a good look for her. She's having a lesbianic "G.I. Jane" moment and I don't like it at all. "But Royal~T," you ask, "What does this mean?? Is she gay? Does she have cancer? Has she lost her fucking mind?" Well, the answer is that only one of those assumptions is correct. She HAS lost her fucking mind. She shaved off all this hair and donated it to a cancer clinic, who will be saving it to sell, later on, for a quote-unquote "Good Cause". I mean DANG Brit, if you wanna help society..... just..... put on some clothes, you tacky whore. Geezus. No hair, NO drawls (that's nigga speak for panties), and NO class. That's why Miss Spears is this weeks "idiot of the week". Oh, and I went all over the place to bring you the very first "post bald" pic of Britney. Most unflattering. Thanks to hipandpop.com, Here it is:

Royal*T rants about..... "The blogspot"

Okay my people, there is this blog I go to (or rather used to). It's called "The Blogspot". When I first got there, I was instantly popular. The regulars couldn't get enough of my style, and my forward personality. The fact that I was brutally honest was comical to them. ANYWAYZ, after a long time of getting to know the blogs author, Steups, I fell for him. HARD. But it turns out he was an asshole to the third degree, and he burned me. He used everyone around me to hurt me, to piss me off, so I would ramble on and on and make his shitty blog more interesting. Dirty , right? Well, I've made the best friends and worst enemies one could ever ask for. The blogspot is a place where dreams are made and destroyed. (LOL) The place was full of fraudulent bitches, raggedy ass hoes, wannabe poser type bitches, and a few really good, decent folks. If you're gonna go there, make sure you wear a helmet. They play rough. Actually, it was "The Blogspot" where I made my first super~enemy, a basset hound by the name of Posh Gemz. She's as classy as she is attractive, which means she's a total cavewoman. An animal, as Tiffany Pollard put it best. And the Steups guy... oh god where do I begin about HIM. He's like.... insane or something. He's a sadistic fuck, and one of these day's he'll get what's coming to him. And that's all I have to say about THAT. Both of them have the psychotically cowardly habit of envoking arguments with me and then erasing every word I say, therefore making the argument look one~sided and giving themselves the last word. And yet they constantly call ME immature. Fuck outta here. (LOL)

Fantasia's "Purple Reign"

Fantasia, my fellow North Carolinian, will be doing it big this spring when she becomes the second "American Idol" vet to perform on Broadway. Fantasia's acting debut was last years "life is not a fairy tell", which was based on her autobiography and aired on Lifetime. Now Miss 'Tasia will be playing a part in Oprah Winfrey's newbroadway musical, "The Color Purple". Now I don't mean to be mean, but anyone who takes ONE look at my girl Fancy can see which part she'll be playing. Yep, you guessed it! Miss Celie. This is gonna be GREAT for Fantasia, and it should help her get over the "Dreamgirls" fiasco. Because guess what? Until Jennifer Hudson landed the role, it is speculated that Fantasia was to play the role of Effie White in Dreamgirls. But now my girl Fancy is on BROADWAY. So take that Jennifer, you chunky bitch. (LOL jez kidding, madd love Jen!)

Where's the BEEF?

Well, Well, Well. Lookie what I have HERE. Many people think I love drama. And the truth of the matter is, that's only half true. I only REALLY enjoy drama when it's happening to someone else. If drama is around me... then a bitch just might get cut. ANYWAYZ, y'all know I'm a youtube whore, and you can find a conspiracy there much faster than ANY Perez Hilton post. (Yea I took a stab @ him) Anywayz, while looking around, I found this little gem. It's a video Cam'ron made as a diss to "Fitty" Cent, nee Curtis Jackson. Watch it, it's very funny.


But wait... there's more! I'm a Bitch to the heart, but I'm not a biased Bitch. One has to present both sides of the story. It's only fair. So, here you are, Curtis Jackon's Diss toward Cam'ron. Tell me which one you think is better....

Royal*T Rants about.... "The unlucky lottery winner"

LOL. Okay, this shyt is SO funny to me. Did y'all hear about the lottery winner who won like, a million dollars with a scratch~off ticket? Probably not, but you KNOW I know. Anywayz, for whatever reason, dude decided to take yearly installments instead of a lump sum. But here's the hilarious part. Apparently, this guy has discovered that he has Lieukemia. He needs about $500,000 to be treated at a Lieukemia hospital, but doesn't have that kind of money. The state won't let him change his mind and get a lump sum, so he'll probably live long enough to get only ONE of the yearly 50,000 installments that are owed to him. After he dies, the money will go back to the state. Now, ain't that a BITCH? You guys might not find it that funny, but to a cold~blooded bitch like myself, it's comedy at it's ironic best. Dang.

This Bitch...

Ladies and Gentleman, for you own benefit, PLEASE avoid this woman, known to most as Posh Gemz. Homegirl is really, really crazy. And I don't mean "Chance" from I Love New York Crazy. I mean Glenn Close in "Fatal Attraction" crazy. This deranged ho is psychotic enough to believe that she's the Queen of me, when in fact she's such a punk who eliminates every comment I post on her blog, and she won't even address me. But I guess I'd be a bit of a bitch myself if I had a set of jagged micros in my hair, and split ends. Posh Gemz is a trainwreck. NO... betta yet, Posh Gemz is the result of a train wreck. This woman is an animal ( as I'm sure you can tell by the photograph) and is to be ignored at all cost, because she's a phony ass bitch with a very small amount of class and even less intelligence.

Cordially,

The Diamond Prince,

"Royal*T"

Olsen's Undies

Ashley Olsen was spotted on Vacation in Mexico in little more than her skivvies. Americas favorite "barely legal" party girl sure does know how to let it all hang out, doesn't she? Nasty Bitch. I only pray that they're SUPPOSED to be that gross vanilla color, because there IS a slight chance that they were white when she got 'em. EWWW.

Cover Girls!

Fuck DREAMGIRLS, Beyonce and J~Hud are doin' it up as "Cover" girls, as both of them are featured on the covers of magazines. Here is Beyonce's Sports Illustrated Swimsuit edition cover:


Isn't this bitch fabulous? Beyonce is definetly showing another side of herself, and I must say it's about damned time. Beyonce is only the SECOND "black gull" to be featured (solo) on the cover of the swimsuit issue. Tyra Banks was the first to do so in 1997. Go pick up a copy, the rest of the pics are amazing.













Jennifer Hudson's cover is a little more classy and "High Fashion". Miss thing is featured on the cover of VOGUE magazine, showing off the big mouth that landed her the role as Effie White in "Dreamgirls". Isn't she gorgeous?




The picture is a little gaudy, but I think she looks great, nonetheless. Jennifer has really blown up after her role as Effie, the vivacious big~boned beauty. J~Hud is up for an academy award in the coming weeks, and critics speculate that my girl Jen just might get it. Do your thing, mama!

Happy Valentines Day, you love struck whores. Today is going to be very exciting, and I know al l of you have special plans to carry out today. But never fear, Royal*T's here, and I've penetrated the depths of You tube in order to find you the songs that can take care of even the most DESPERATE of situations. So grab your i~pod and get ready to download some love. Observe:


*For the Bitch who wants his/her boo back; Tank: "Please don't go"

*For the Bitch who is crazy in love and wants to show it; Robin Thicke: "Lost W/O you"

*For the Bitch who wants to serenade her man; Nivea: "25 Reasons"

*For the Bitch who wants some lovin' tonight; Fantasia Barrino: "Nominate U"

*For the Bitch who wants to break up today; Chris Brown: "Say Goodbye"

And there you are. Go look for the song that suits your situation, because now I've given you the tune to make anything possible today. Because NOTHING is more reality altering than music.

Cordially,

"The Pretty Prince"

"V"-lentines!

Tomorrow is Valentine's day, so you have only a short amount of time to do something nice for your honey. Why don't you take you bitch ass over to VSpot and send your sweetie an "I Love New York" flavored valentine's day greeting? They're hilarious. Here's the link:

http://www.vh1.com/shows/index.jhtml?extPop=popVspot(1552211

Royal*T Rants about..... "The Crazy Astronaut"

~Now just LOOK @ this dumb ass bitch. I Swear, words escape me when I think about this woman. She definitely puts the ASS in astronaut. This people, is Ms. Lisa Nowak, the astronaut(ess) who was caught in a love triangle with two other individuals. Honey child decided that enough was enough, so she grabbed a wig, a four-inch folding knife, some rubber tubing, a giant trash bag, and some other fun toys. Police caught the crazy heffa trying to throw all these things away. This was incredibly suspiscious looking, so they arrested her. (She was wearing a diaper). She was en route to go 'nab the woman she suspected was trying to steal her man. Dayum. But I'm not gonna lie... with THAT face, and THAT hair.... and THOSE pores... if I was ever lucky enough to get a man, I'd cut any bitch who'd try to take him, too. SO, it looks like PRISON is the final frontier for this astronaut. And we ALL know what goes on in there... I'm sure all those "estrogen deprived" ladies will have so much fun exploring miss Nowaks depths. ANYWAYZ, that's all I have to say about that, so you guys can drop comment and tell me what y'all think about this psychotic bitch. At any rate, everyone's favorite astronaut is this weeks "Idiot of the week". Until keyboard and Fingertip make love again, this is the Blue Blood Bitch signing off...

~~~~What the Fuck is really good? Most of you know me as "Irresistable Deliscious", but now I go by the name of "Royal*T", Simply because it fits me better. Anywayz, I've tried, TWICE, to create a sparkling, successfull blog. Both went down in flames. But never fear, bitches. Third times a charm. "The Pretty Prince" is bigger, better, and brighter. It's over the top. It's fabulous. My theory is that if you're not gonna make a major move, then don't move @ all. Big is the ONLY way to do it in my perfect world. This place is dedicated to celebrity gossip, and anything interesting. If it's worth knowing, you best fuckin' believe I'll know about it @ least two full days before it even happens. (LOL) By the way, I'm the most opinionated bitch alive, so be on the lookout for the occasional "Royal Rant", which can vary in subject to anything from Botox to B.C.B.G jeans. One thing is certain, though. Now that ROYAL*T is around, things will never be the same again. The internet just got a Whole lot sexier.

Cordially,

The Blue~Blood Bitch